i need answers

ak rase ak perlukan jwpn,as terlalu byk bnda bermain2 kat kepala nih
hidup ni xmudah xsenang n byk bnda baru kna blaja n theres no comfort zone ke safe zone ke any positive zone forever.time kcik2 dlu sibuk na sekolah,bila masuk primary skool sibuk na msuk skolah mnengah na rse hdup as teenagers la knonnye,bile masuk scondary skool,sibuk na rse hdup kat u plak,na rse complete freedom la knonnye..dulu bile org yg da bsar2 ni kte na putar mse bia dpt masuk skolah balik sume,ak dgn megah na tggu besar,na complete freedom,na shopping sakan,na enjoy ngn kengkawan aje..
but i never realised the bigger u are,the bigger the problem is..
u dont encounter dgn masalah2 macam sape amik cklat ak?ari ni nk men congkak ke swing?(im too old that i dont wat its called now.waaa)but kna layan masalah plek spt ble kna siapkan assignmnt?bila na byr utang?mcm mne na carik duet?
dulu carik kwn na ajk men kjar2,hide n seek je,now kawan bt tman mgumpat,tkang prunding masalah cinta,tkang bt comment bju mne yg lg cntik,etc!
wat if u become older,but u mind seems not to tolerate?
bile masalah org2 dewasa datang,ur clueless,xtau na bt ap?
when it comes in choosing things,u dont know which one to choose?its so hard to cj=hoose till u feels like ur head going to explode?
as u get older,u lie more but ur afraid of kantoing urself that u feel so uneasy and swear that u wont do it again but u end up repeating it AGAIN?
that u tend to please everyone but u end up hurting everyone?
that u tink u have to grow up but u mind seems to say no?
that u wish you only have to be on dat bed for ur whole lifeeee?
that u miss someone soooo much that u have to admit it but u cant?
is theres time u feel very empty?so empty that u think the emptiness itself cn kill u?
pnh rase  bersalah,serba salah,disalahlan yg buat hati rasa sendat dan packed n rse oksigen kat dunia ni dah berkurang sbb byk open burning?
pnh rase lonely yg bt kte rase na mnanges tbe2?
i think im growing up too much,until i couldnt deal wth  it anymore